“I am a lover of what is, not because I’m a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. We can know that reality is good just as it is, because when we argue with it, we experience tension and frustration. We don’t feel natural or balanced. When we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, fluid, kind, and fearless.”
~Byron Katie, Loving What Is
This quote always makes me think of my dear friend Stephanie and the way she inspires me to accept whatever challenges life may throw my way.
Stephanie showed up for a second trimester ultrasound to check up on baby number two. Stephanie and her husband had almost decided to skip it but had a feeling it was something they needed to do. As the ultrasound tech scanned over the face multiple times, Stephanie knew something was up. The tech switched over to the 3D ultrasound and it was immediately clear that the baby had a bilateral cleft lip. This type of cleft lip is almost always associated with bilateral cleft palate but they wouldn’t find out until later how severe it was. The not knowing was one of the hardest parts. She grieved the fact that her baby wouldn’t be able nurse. She spent hours and hours researching, emailing and going to appointments to see if there was ANY thing she could do. When Royal was born and the extent of her cleft lip and palate was known, it presented new challenges and information. The confirmation that Royal wouldn’t be able to breastfeed was a lot to take in and process. Paired with the breastfeeding information, this family was also given knowledge that Royal would need over twenty surgeries- some at a very young age.
What inspires me so much about Stephanie is how passionately she has come to love and accept what is. She had what many of us would see as an insurmountable challenge. Sitting in hospital cubicles pumping breastmilk, taking her young infant to appointments to be poked and prodded by strangers, and even more hours at home pumping. But over time, it just came to be, well…life. When I feel like life is throwing more at me than I can handle, I think of Stephanie and Royal and remember that the only way through is embracing reality rather than trying to fight it.
Speaking of embracing reality… we make plans for things that seem simple, like photographing a new wrap. Seems simple enough right?
Photos plans plus a toddler, a wildly windy day, a house with an empty fridge and only an hour before Uppyboy’s Sportball class…… you have a recipe for photos that might be more blooper reel than lifestyle magazine. But yet again, Stephanie’s acceptance of reality inspired me to do the same.
Sometimes the outtakes of life are a lot more fun than the highlight reel. Then again, maybe the outtakes are the highlight reel. The messiness we want to cut out, to sanitize and curate, to make our lives look flawless…well that messy is what makes up our crazy wonderful days with these small humans. Sometimes you just have to roll with what comes your way and accept the bounciness of the toddler (and the plastic lime bottle they’ve decided to drink out of?!) knowing that this is what you’ll want to remember one day. Because it’s real. It’s true. Only in giving up on perfection can we find our own version of perfect.
You know those people in your life that you just can’t get enough of? People who are so magnetic you just can’t help standing too close to them so you can bask in their wonderfulness?
We were thinking of those people when we made this wrap.